Hi, I’m Amber.
Consider me a Reformed Plain Jane.
I was raised by a young, single father. That statement alone should tell you, I wasn’t brought up like most girls.
I can remember grinding my teeth as my hair got brushed with man force. Hanging out and playing video games and pretending I was part of the band with all of my “Uncles”. Dressing in sweats made by Grandma with love over learning fashionable trends. When it came time for girl stuff, I got a book called “Deal With It” by girl.com for Christmas, some pads showed up in the bathroom, and not much else was said.
The original rule was no make up until 16. A rule I challenged as early as I could. Explaining to a man why you feel like you need make-up, is futile. Especially to a man struggling to see you as a young woman.
I was a preteen in the year 2000, so I managed to blend in with my misguided choices. We all had bright blue eyeliner, sparkley eyeshadows and bad brows. These days girls are skipping this coming of age moment.. but back in the day, the ugly duckling ritual was REAL. You’d leave the last year of middle school, your mom, older sister, or whoever would innitiate you to womanhood over the summer. You would return to high school a beautiful swan. It was freakin’ magical.
That did not happen for me.
I missed the innitiation. Big time. While I did convince Dad to ease up on his make up rules, looking back, I kind of wish he hadn’t. They say with great power comes great responsibility…
I didn’t use it wisely.
In high school I rocked smudged black eyeliner, and one shade of eye shadow to match my outfit. I also fried the hell out of my hair dieing and heat drying it without any products.
In my early twenties I would get ready for the bars with my girlfriends. I was always planted on the toilet seat being poked and proded at like a science project. I would leave the house feeling overdone, and arrive at the club as an awkward hyeina, stragling behind a pack of lionesses.
I had never heard of deep conditioning. I’d never met a skin care routine. I cant smoke an eye, cat an eye, honestly, 90% of the time my eyeliner looks like sharpie. One time.. I found my roomate’s eyelash curler and watched in horror as she demonstrated what it did.
Seriously, you guys, no clue how to be a woman.
I managed to slide through most of my 20s as a basic, ugg & hoodie wearing mascara girl. Until one day I discovered exactly what I could gain from beauty.
When I was in one of my darkest, most depresessed and anxious places, the one thing I noticed most was a lack of self esteem. When I put in a bit of effort, I feel better. When I feel better about myself, I feel better about going after life.
If you asked a younger me, or even this time last year me, where I would be… the last thing I would ever say is an Avon girl! I found a love for beauty products as I was learning to love myself. I gained a sense of confidence and self worth… and I want to share it!
Change can be terrifying, but lately I’ve learned to embrace change, growth and progress.
My goal is to inspire others like me to nurture their own self love along with me.
Welcome to The Allure Blog! I am so excited to share my journey with you!